about the book
April Anderson’s remarkable memoir of her half-century marriage to a man eventually diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome captures the reader’s attention from the compellingly perfect opening sentence to the last poignant page.
Anderson has a gift for storytelling and humor as she invites the reader into her inner world of thoughts, feelings, and ponderings. Hurt and bewildered by her husband’s inexplicable behavior despite herculean efforts to understand and live in harmony with him, Anderson chronicles in intimate detail the profound toll that the marriage takes on her physical and emotional health.
Even while fervently hoping for a change, she ultimately breaks loose from the bonds of trauma and regains her self-identity, true spirit, and peace.
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“April Anderson captures the struggle with intimacy faced by those who love people with autism. She carefully depicts day-to-day issues that seem senseless and unpredictable. The frustration with trying to address and solve issues with strategies that normally resolve most matters is dealt with directly with true grit. With determination and a sense of humor the author portrays the quest for a loving relationship that is often one-sided and disappointing. This book can provide support for someone addressing similar challenges while loving someone with autism. Intense and enlightening."
—Cheryl Nye, Psychologist and Author, Taming Autism
“April’s storytelling is both enlightening and informative, carrying the reader swiftly along with her, through her experiences with Bruce, her Asperger's husband, as she describes some of the ebbs and flows of the good, the bad, and the ugly of their marriage, and the added dimensions of an Aspie-Neurotypical relationship. In her memoir, April illustrates how patience and tolerance are tantamount to a successful marriage, and how 'understanding your source' is key to your own health and happiness"
-Lauren Millman, Owner of Lauren Wellness, Certified Relationship and Communication Coach specializing in Aspie-Neurotypical relationships
“Relationships are hard for everyone. Imagine living in a world where everyone is speaking a language and doing things you don’t quite understand. Now, imagine being in a relationship with someone who lives in that world. Autism can look different in everyone and some of the things that make someone different can be special. Many individuals with autism can mask their symptoms of autism for a little while. Sometimes the autism is not identified until much later in life when things are not going so well anymore. Often partners of someone in a relationship will make their significant other see a therapist to 'see what is wrong with them' and feel vindicated when there is an autism diagnosis. The truth is the person with autism is not going to be cured of their autism because of a diagnosis, it’s up to the partner to learn how to live with that person. Couples have chosen many paths of cohabitation, including living apart. Ms. Anderson tells one story that is unique to her family. Read about her discoveries that have allowed her to finally find her own happiness."
—Heidi Mizell, Family Navigator and Certified Peer Support Specialist, Autism Delaware
“It is a rare privilege to read an autobiography by an ordinary person whose life, when viewed at the correct level of magnification, is extraordinary. In Love, Honor, and Asperger's, April Anderson rolls the highlight reel of a half-century of marriage to a man with Asperger's Syndrome. Through unabashed humor and unflinching self-reflection, Anderson's story about her husband's neurological condition and her own health challenges becomes a universal fable of loving, trying one's best, and ultimately, forgiving oneself for plunging headlong into what might have been avoided. . . In telling her story about an Aspie relationship, Anderson invites everyone to the table where we can talk, break bread and weep together about all manner of messy relationships . . . Anderson makes us belly-laugh without mean-spiritedness, cry with a mixture of sympathy and first-hand knowledge, and ultimately, thank our lucky stars for the warning. This book is an experience not to be missed."
—Jill Richburg, Attorney, Life Coach, and Acting Teacher
“As a woman currently in the process of divorcing a man with (undiagnosed) high-functioning autism, I find so much comfort in knowing I’m not alone in this struggle. April’s conversational, and often humorous, writing style immediately drew me in. Hearing her articulate, with grace and humility, so many of the struggles that I’ve also endured through the course of my own marriage, I can’t help but find comfort in the solidarity. The problems I viewed as “unique” to my relationship are far more common than I realized. Everyone needs a friend who truly understands what it is like to navigate love and marriage to someone on the spectrum. If you have no one in your corner, I encourage you to read “Love, Honor, and Asperger’s.” You will find that friend in April. I’m so thankful that I did!